massage etiquette

It's Okay if you Didn't Shave...Really!

It's Okay if you Didn't Shave...Really!

Let’s face it, getting a massage takes a lot of vulnerability. You are letting your therapist see parts of your body that you don’t allow most people to see. Your stretch marks, scars, cellulite, and birthmarks are exposed and you’re trusting us to respect your boundaries and treat you with the utmost honor and respect.

While some people have an unlimited supply of self-confidence that allows them to feel comfortable in most any situation, some put themselves under a microscope critiquing every inch of their body. We often forget that each mark is a memory or a lesson. Your stretch marks may mark an incredible journey of the time you welcomed a child into the world, the time you chose a healthier lifestyle and released extra pounds you had, or the time that you decided to enjoy life and be happy with who you were instead of obsessively counting calories or limiting yourself. Your scars may be from an accident that taught you how precious life was, or the time you refused to listen to your mom when you were 5 and learned a valuable life lesson. Your cellulite shows that your skin isn’t absolutely perfect, just like all those people using photo shop and filters to fool the world. Your birthmarks show you live, that you are uniquely made and there is no other like you. But there’s another common concern a lot of clients have, particularly women.

Am I Supposed to Talk During a Massage?

It’s a common question that massage therapists hear all the time; “Can I talk during the massage?” Some clients are worried about talking too much or too little. They want to be friendly but not ruin the whole experience. But what do massage therapists say?

It’s up to you!

If you want to talk, go for it. If you want to be completely silent, go for it. If you want to talk a little, but not the entire time, that’s fine too. What a lot of clients tend to forget, is it’s your time. Whether you’re getting a 15 minute chair massage or a two hour full body massage, how much conversation there is, is completely up to you.

Many clients find it comforting to talk for the first few minutes of a massage, especially their first few sessions as we’re getting to know each other and build the trust that is really important to a great therapeutic relationship. Then as they get more comfortable, the conversations get shorter and shorter, and sometimes go away completely. For some clients, a large part of the relief they get from their massages is the ability to vent and get everything off their chest to someone they can trust, so they spend the entire massage chatting.

What you need to understand, is that as your massage therapist, my job is to facilitate your healing, in whatever way you need me to, within my skillset of course. For some that means silence, for others it means talking, and others are anywhere in between.


Go for it, but please be aware, that sometimes you may not get the full benefits of your massage if you’re talking the entire time. What I mean by this, is that calm breathing and a calm state of mind greatly emphasizes the benefits of the massage. So even if you prefer to talk, I may, at times, ask you to take some deep breaths to calm your body so it can better receive the work I’m doing.


Please understand that I may occasionally check in about my pressure, certain areas of concern, and things like that. I’ll do my best to keep quiet and not disturb your experience in any way, but I also want to ensure you get the most of your massage; and that means checking that everything I’m doing is what your body needs and you’re comfortable with it. Even though you may like to stay quiet, don’t hesitate to speak up and let me know if anything is uncomfortable. While your tissues and your body language may give clues as to a pain response, I’m still in the dark as to what exactly you’re feeling, so please let me know if I need to lighten my pressure, increase it, move to a different area, or anything else you feel is necessary. This is your massage and I want it to be perfect for you. The only way that can happen is if there is at least a little bit of communication throughout the session; more so if you prefer clinical or therapeutic techniques.

No matter how much or how little you prefer to talk during your massage, it is completely up to you. Please don’t ever feel obligated to talk unless I’m asking you a question, and don’t be afraid to speak up either.